Reddit Moving Where You Dont Know Anyone
From making friends equally an adult to finding the perfect task, hither'due south what you demand to know about starting a new life in a new place.
Starting over in a new metropolis where you don't know anyone is exhilarating, life-changing and, at times, heartbreaking – and information technology'south something I call up everyone should do at least once.
Here at Livability, we focus a lot on where to move: the best cities to notice a job, the best places for travel addicts, the Top 100 Best Places to Live in America, etc.
But once you lot've moved to a new place, how do you adjust and thrive? Once you've figured out the basics similar setting up your internet service and non getting lost on your way to piece of work, what do you lot demand to know to navigate a new life yous're building from scratch?
I've started over in new cities with varying degrees of success. From creating a new routine to making friends as an developed, here are some lessons I've learned (the hard way).
1. Get a regular.
Beingness surrounded by newness is thrilling. When you move to a new place, every moment of every 24-hour interval brings a sense of discovery and surprise. New people! New restaurants! New smells and sights and sounds!
Revel in this abiding stream of novelty, merely brand room for a bit of regularity and routine. Choose a java shop or bar you lot like, and go there often. Become to know the baristas or bartenders. Let them become to know y'all.
By doing this, you're laying the foundation of your new community and your twenty-four hours-to-day life. This volition anchor you and keep y'all sane. Trust me on this.
2. Be most comically ambitious in your efforts to make friends.
Making friends every bit an adult is hard. When people ask me how to do it, I always say the same thing: you've got to exist ridiculously, consistently, comically aggressive in your efforts to connect with people.
That neighbor whose car has a bumper sticker you lot agree with? Invite her over for tea. That person you chat with after yoga? You should definitely see if they want to take hold of lunch after form one twenty-four hours. That barista y'all've got a good rapport with? You need to inquire them what they practice for fun (and come across if you lot tin tag forth).
I have actually said, "I like your shirt. Want to be friends?" to a woman I met in the bathroom of a Taylor Swift concert. This is the level of shamelessness that building a social life from scratch requires.
The bottom line? You lot need to hang out with lots and lots of people to find the ones you click with. Y'all won't click with everyone. That's OK. Only in club to find your tribe, you need to leave your pride (and sometimes your nobility) at the door, and be the initiator of your own social life.
iii. Say yes to everything. (Literally everything.)
This goes hand in hand with tip #ii: in addition to all the social invitations you're extending, y'all also demand to say yes to every invitation that comes your way. This includes verbal invites, formal invitations and flyers on coffee store message boards.
Do you desire to go to your barista's spoken word poesy reading? Yes.
Practice you want to assistance your coworker paint her living room? Yep.
Practice you want to get to a costless aerial yoga workshop? Yeah.
When you say "yes," you lot are opening yourself up to experiences and people and activities that volition ascertain and inform your new life in this new place. Take this weird, new, undefined stage of your life as an opportunity to effort a agglomeration of new things and meet a bunch of new people and see what sticks.
iv. Don't wait for The Perfect Thing.
Moving to a new place usually comes with a lot of expectations nigh what your new life will look like, and the perfect job/partner/house/social group that volition define that new, perfect life.
I'm hither to (gently) encourage you to let get of your focus on The Perfect Affair, and instead exist open to all the unexpected opportunities you will run across in this new place. When a door opens for you, no matter how offbeat or seemingly random, walk through information technology and see where it leads.
Following this advice, I accept worked role-fourth dimension at boutiques, volunteered for political campaigns, washed copywriting for bands, created chalk fine art signs for coffee shops and attended supremely awkward themed parties at suburban mansions.
None of these things were the ultimate perfect thing, but every single one of them led me to another opportunity or person who got me closer to it – or to something even meliorate.
Don't exist picky about opportunities. Don't go hung upwards on the perfect thing. Walk through every door that opens – and I guarantee you'll be surprised and delighted at where it leads you.
5. Don't be ashamed to be a tourist.
In the try to assimilate to a new city, I think a lot of people tend to skip over the "gleeful tourist" phase and go direct to the "unimpressed local" phase. Y'all lose something when you do this. Here's the affair: y'all moved to this new place for a reason. It'south a cool place that's worth exploring.
The start six months I lived in Nashville, I went to the Grand Ole Opry probably once a month. A lot of locals have either never been or think information technology's kind of corny (which it totally is), but information technology gave me a couple hours to sing forth to country songs in a historic venue and think, "Wow, I alive in Nashville." (It also helped me learn the lyrics to "Rocky Top," which has proven to exist a CRUCIAL skill as a Tennessee resident.)
half dozen. Stay curious.
Even as you become more comfy, don't stop asking questions or being curious almost the identify, the people and the culture of your new home. I've lived in Nashville for six years at present and I nevertheless enquire people I come across, "What's your favorite subconscious precious stone in the city?" or "What do you lot love about living here?"
Hold on to that sense of curiosity and discovery, and many years afterward moving somewhere, you'll find it all the same feels new and exciting. And peradventure most importantly, yous'll never forget why yous moved in that location in the commencement place.
Source: https://livability.com/topics/make-your-move/6-things-you-need-to-know-about-starting-over-in-a-new-city/
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